Standing outside of Ryerson, smoking a cigarette and drinking a $5.08 starbucks coffee I see a man approach two young women and ask them for change. They quite easily reject him. He walks along trying the next person who just happens to be me. Knowing what’s coming next I feel the obvious pang of discomfort.

There he is standing in front of me, disheveled, slightly balding, visibly shaking and asking me for some change to get something to eat – staring at me with deep brown eyes filled with desperation. What else could I do but offer him something to eat? I beleive strongly in not giving homeless people a transferable form of exchange be it bus tickets, or money. The same was true for this gentlemen. I asked him what he wanted to eat and he specified that he wanted a sub. So I offered to buy it for him.

As we walked he described his life situation and his next problem – finding a place to sleep. He specified that his step parents had kicked him out of the house, and he no longer had a fixed address which, therefore, renders him ineligible for welfare. He spoke to me about a few of the places that he’s tried to seek shelter: Seaton House, Covenant House, MacMillan House and the list goes on. Apparently, some of these places are free and some of them are not. I felt helpless, listening to this man without being able to make one good recommendation as to where he could go or what he could do. He explained to me that all of the places that were free are full and he had no money to go to where you pay for it.

After I finished paying for his meal he stood in front of me, looking into my soul with those deep brown eyes filled with despair and now appreciation, asking if I could give him money for his night at the shelter. I looked hard at him and the money in my hand as I considered the decision. Yes I had the money – but he stood there in front of me, still visibly shaking almost certainly from some form of drugs. So I told him, honestly, that he’s standing in front of me shaking and that I am not willing to give him money directly. He told me that it’s been a while since he’s had his “medicine” and that was the cause of his shaking. When he said the word “medicine” I automatically came to the conclusion that giving this man money would mean supporting whatever habit this man has. Another factor in my decision was that I offered to walk over and pay directly yet he declined, explaining that he didn’t want to take up too much of my time.

But I wonder if I passed judgement. Did I impose some predispositioned thought or stereotype of homeless people on this man or did I do the right thing by declining to support his proposed shelter for the evening?

I don’t know the answer, but the thought that I chose paternalism over altruism bothers me because the decision was made with potentially asymettric information.

Would you have given him the money?